Just a bikini (part 6)
Photos originally posted on TDF, UKLDF and ODC
14-30 November 2013

Ok, ok it is just a bikini

Ever since I have decided to make Stellai into a person of her own, I am facing all kind of new experiences. Even though Stellai’s thoughts sprout from my mind, and I am able to control them, I refuse to let this get to the level of enslavery. Being firmly against every kind of discrimination, enslavery is simply not acceptable to me. In my relation to Stellai this is complicated, but therefor the more fascinating because her complete being is a new kind of exercise for my mind. I constantly have to ask myself if Stellai’s thoughts really are hers, or just mine, addressing them as being hers because it suits me better. More than once I discovered that a thought was in fact not hers, but mine. In my defense I can however say that in spite our differences there are also a lot of things in which we fully agree with each other and for which the addressing of a thought is six of one and half a dozen of the other. Not that this makes it any easier. In fact the opposite because it urges me to double check just about every thought

Because the actions one does are mostly already initiated and performed by ones subconscious, Stellai actions run prior to her thoughts. Because she is a doll, this really is very weird. But it is true, because the photos were made long before I wrote this text. Of course I agree that prior to the making of the photos there was at some idea in my head about what was to come. But if this idea was fully my own, now that is the question. So it seems that there is the famous chicken-egg paradox, which by its sheer existence does lift Stellai up to being an entity.
If you lost me here, I won’t blame you. I can’t hardly follow it myself. Personally it strikes me like the old math calculations that I had to make in highschool where I just followed the logic and finally got to an answer which was regarded to be correct, but which from my perspective also could have been something completely different if I just would have followed another for me equally logic path

I was not sure what Stellai had said to Oksanna before her swing to my storage cabinet for drawings, but it must have eased her. Oksanna patiently waited and made no effort to leave my desk. So I decided to let them be and continue my work

You might say that I did see this coming and you are right. but I was still surprised when it happened. I guess it was because Stellai’s wardrobe, which I completely had to make myself that I also consider it my property. But it is a silly thought. After all it is quite obvious that I am never going to wear these clothes myself and that if they are not Stellai’s, then who else is going to wear it ? Not me, that’s for certain! As long as I do not have made a second ScoonimDoll for myself, Stellai has a point when she thinks she does not need to ask anyone for permission to give away that clothing

I admit that the addition of this last pic is a bit of a payback. The risk of sticking your tongue out to somebody that has a camera in his hands is that you will be eternalized with your tongue hanging out of your mouth for everybody to see. Sorry my dear you should have thought of that before you did!

To be continued...



Just a Bikini (part 5)
Just a Bikini (part 7)